Ninjas on TV and Pixie Dust
by Hotomi-Tsukino
Summary: Hotomi here. I'm going to film the Naruto characters while they are in highschool. There will be cameras everywhere and my little sister will be there. Neji finds out about us filming, then wants us 2 hook him and Tenten. Will we succed? Read to find out.
1. Meeting Team Seven and Pixie Dust

Hotomi-Tsukiko: Hey all its me Hotomi here with naruto and hinata say hi guys.

Naruto: Yo datteboy!

Hinata: H-h-h-hello.

Hotomi-Tsukiko: Aren't they cute yes they are, anyway say...THE...DISCLAMER!I feel so proud of myself.

Naruto: Hotomi doesn't own any of the characters.

Hinata: Except her character which is Hotomi and Kamoto is her friends character.

Hotomi-Tsukiko: If I did Neji would already hook up with Tenten and Naruto would already be hooked up with Hinata. Hinata and Naruto would have a sex scene. Itachi, Deidara, Sasori, Asuma, and Kakuzu wouldn't be dead.

Hinata: *faints*

Naruto: HINATA!

* * *

**At The Tv Station**

Hotomi: Yo! I'm Hotomi Tsukiko famous actor. I'm going to follow the high school life of the naruto characters isn't that exciting? I know it is well lets go.

Kamoto: What about my introduction?

Hotomi: What introduction? Who are you anyway?

Kamoto: YOUR SISTER!

Hotomi: Oh, yeah. Go head and introduce yourself.

Kamoto: I'm Kamoto Tsukiko younger sister of Hotomi and also a famousactor. In advance let me say sorry for my sister's stupidness.

Hotomi: Hey!

Kamoto: Yo!

Hotomi: Thats why I make more money and this is your last show.

Kamoto: What?

Hotomi: Nothing.

Kamoto:...

Director: STOP GOING OUT OF SCRIPT, I HAVE LIMITED TIME AND MONEY AND WHY AM I YELLING?

Kamoto: I DON'T KNOW.

Hotomi: YOU'RE ALL MOTHERFUCKERS!

Director:...

Kamoto:...

Hotomi:...

Director: Lets just get on with the show,ok.

Kamoto: Yeah, Hotomi take it away.

Hotomi: Ok, we are having a new show. Kamoto and I are going to see what the Naruto characters high school life is like.

Kamoto: And in the end we will tell them they are on tv.

Hotomi: Won't they be suprised?

Kamoto: We will even have personal talk sesions with all the characters.

Hotomi: I know what you are thinking, won't they find out they are being filmed when we have talk sesions with them with cameras staring in their faces?

Kamoto: Well you are wrong they won't find out.

Hotomi: Because we have...

Kamoto: Pixie dust. Pixie dust will wipe their memories clean.

Hotomi: And for a special price of $500 we will sell you your own jar of pixie dust.

Kamoto: Plus shipping and handling.

Hotomi: How does pixie dust work you ask? Well Kamoto show them.

Kamoto: Alright. Hey, kid come here.

Random kid walks in.

Random kid: Yeah

Kamoto: *punches kid in face really hard*

Random kid: WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR!

Kamoto: Pixie dust, poof. *throws pixie dust in boys face*

Random kid: Mama. *gurgling baby noises or whatever noise baby makes*

Kamoto: Whoops. To much pixie dust.

Director: Warning. Pixie dust may cause to much memory disappearance, bleeding from eyes, heart explosion, brain explosion, tendency to say datteboy, farts that murder, and explosive diarreha.

Hotomi: There you have it, well on with the show.

* * *

In an blue house, there lived a boy with blond spiky hair. He was getting ready for school, when a moving truck pulled up the house next door. Said boy was wondering who would move to crazy Old man Cracker's old house. No one would move their since his murde- I mean death, all natural death. He wasn't murdered in any kind of way. Hehehe.

Anyway, the boy started to get dressed thinking probably some crazy bitches who wants a piece of him. His ripped hard abs with a 100 pack. His eyes as blue as the ocean. His sun yellow spiky hair. His rock hard as-.

_Hotomi: Okay, did Hinata write this?_

_Hinata: What, I would never write that. I typed it._

_Hotmi: You're getting eviler and more smartasseir Hinata. I like it._

_Hinata: ..._

_Hotomi: Don't be all shy now._

_Kamoto: Get on with the show. Wait, how is Hinata here?_

_Hotomi:..._

_Hinata:..._

_Everyone else in the studio:..._

_Kamoto: Pixie dust._

_Hinata: Who am I?_

_Hotomi: Shit._

This boys name is Naruto. After finishing putting on his uniform, curiosity got the better of him. He looked out the window and saw thse most beautiful girl ever.

_Kamoto: What the hell._

_Hotomi: What?_

_Kamoto: ..._

_Hotomi: That's how it is._

_Kamoto: ..._

_Hotomi: Fine. Readers just forget you ever read that part._

_Kamoto: 4th WALL BREAKER!_

This girl had long, curly, dark purple hair with a curly ahoge. Bright purple and yellow heterochromia eyes. With big double d breasts. (And yes this is necessary.) Another girl about three inches shorter came out of the murdered, I mean natural death man's house. She had black hair with blue highlights in twin tails. (Twin tails are hot.) This girl has dark blue eyes with a hint of green.

_Naruto: Are they siblings? If they are why do they have different eye colors? I'll just be my nosy self and spy on them. I just might pull a prank if the irritate me._

Kushina: NARUTO GET YOUR ASS OUT OF BED!

Naruto: MY ASS IS OUT OF BED AND ITS GOING STRAIGHT FOR YOUR TOOTHBRUSH!

Kushina: You little.

*stomp stomp stomp stomp*

Naruto: Oh shit.

Kushina: You little asswipe. I'm going to spank you loke the good mommy I am.

Naruto:AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!

30 MINUTES LATER

Kushina: You better get an A on that test today or you'll get spanked again.

Naruto: Y-y-yes.

Kushina: Good. Minato I want a better child.

After Naruto's asswhooping, he hid behind the bushes on his lawn. The girl with the purple hair bend down and her panties showed a bit, cause she was wearing a skirt. Naruto's nose started to bleed and his neighbor downstairs was knocking.

_Hinata: * glares at Hotomi*_

_Hotomi: Um...Uh...Yeah..._

_Kamoto: Akward._

_Hotomi: Pixie Dust, poof._

Naruto: Nice ass. Hehehe.

Little did Naruto know, a boy with chicken ass hair stalked up behind him.

Mystery boy: What are you doing dobe.

Naruto: *twitches* Stop calling me that teme.

Mystery boy: Then stop calling me teme.

Naruto: TTTTTEEEEEMMMMMEEEE.

Mystery boy: I have a name it's Sasuke.

Naruto: Sooooo, what's your point teme.

Sasuke: Nevermind. What are you doing anyway.

Naruto: I'm spying on the new girl that moved across the street.

Sasuke: Remember what happened last time you spied on the new neighbor across the street?

Naruto: No.

Sasuke: He died.

Naruto: Oh yeah. But that old man desreved it. Being named after a snack is so mean, he didn't even taste like one.

Sasuke: Stupid.

Naruto: WHAT DID YOU SAY!

Naruto grabs Sasuke's school uniform shirt, looking ready to kill him at any moment. Sasuke just stares at him blankly as if saying go ahead it won't hurt. He pulls back his fist ready to hit Sasuke. Why you ask, well he called him an stupid. He's not one... Well... Okay he does suck at school gets Fs and who gets a F in lunch and gym. Never mind I take that back he is stupid.

_Naruto: Hey._

_Hotomi: How the hell you get in here._

_Naruto: The power of breaking the fourth wall._

_Kamoto: Stop breaking the fourth wall._

_Construction men : Yeah. Do you know how much time and money we spend on repairing it? Do you know how many times we had to fight for our lives fighting back characters like you trying to break the fourth wall? I lost my right eye to Spongebob Square Pants. He blew bubbles over and over again. They keep getting in my eye blinding it. Now I bump into things on my right. I keep having flashbacks every night. I can hear his stupid laugh over and over again. Mommy, help me. MOMMY!_

_Hotomi:..._

_Naruto:..._

_Kamoto:...Pixie dust. Poof._

Before Naruto could punch Sasuke, another fist came out of nowhere and punched him, he went flying into the sky. All you could see was a twinkling star in the distance. This person had pink hair and was proud of it. Her name was Sakura Haruno. Girl Power. She was huffing and puffing.

Sakura: Naruto I'M GOING TO HUFF, PUFF, AND BLOW YOUR HOUSE DOWN!

WITH THE BEAUTIFUL GIRLS ACROSS THE STREET

Puroled hair girl: Wow! She's so strong. I wish I could punch like that.

Black haired girl: You already can.

Purple haired girl: Oh yeah.

Black haired girl: Set the camera up, we have to introduce ourselves to new viewers.

Purple haired girls: Fine.

Both girls look at the camera. They do the Ca-Me-Ha-Me-Ha pose. What the fuck.

Both: Hello all new viewers!

Purple haired girl: I'm Hotomi Tsukiko.

Blue haired girl: And I'm Kamoto Tsukiko.

Both: Welcome to the Tsukiko Variety Show!

Hotomi: We have a great show for you today.

Kamoto: We just moved into the house next door to The Naruto Uzumaki.

Hotomi: We are going to spy on him and his friends.

Kamoto: And yes viewers this is legal.

Hotomi: I know you fangirls would want to see some hot, shirtless boys so stick around. We even sell pictures, hairs, and clothing. We are risking our lives for you fans out there.

Kamoto: Back to the topic, we'll even hold talk sessions with them.

Hotomi: Wait a minute.

Kamoto: What's wrong?

Hotomi: We already said this shit on our last episode. Just look at the script. This is just last weeks script changed around.

Kamoto: Let me see. *gasps*

Both of the girls glare at thes script maker. Script maker man looks behind him. He looks puzzled. He starts raking up his brain trying to figure out why they are mad.

Script maker man: *gasps*

Hotomi: Gasp is right. Why the hell is this script last weeks script just mixed up?

Script maker man: I just wnated to be the best darn script maker the world has ever known.

Kamoto: What?

The moving truck starts to morph into a stage. Smoke is covering the stage. A board in the back rises up. The board says "Gotta Write Them All". In the middle of the stage is the Script maker man cosplaying as Ash Ketchum. He grabs the microphone and startes voice was a lovely melody. Oh, wait wrong script. His voice was a horindous sound. It's a combination of dying cats, nails scratching a blackboard, and crying babies.

Script maker man: I want to be the very best, that no-one has ever known. To write them is my real test, to entertain them that's my cause. I will travel across the world, searching far and wide. These words to understand the power that's inside. Writing! Oh, your my best friend.

Hotomi: Security!

Script maker man: Wait, I haven't got to the best part yet. No. Stop. Let me go no my dreams are shattered. My heart is !

The security drag the Script maker man off the a 30 minute time out. The director walks in wondering what the hell was all that noise.

Director: What the hell was all that noise?

Kamoto: The Script writer man cracked.

Director: Again?

Hotomi: Again.

Director: I won't ask how that happemed but hurry up. We don't have much money for anymore minutes.

Both: Okay.

Both: *turns to the camera*

Hotomi: Well there you have it our script writer finally cracked.

Kamoto: So it will be awhile before the next show.

Hotomi: And we didn't blow our cover. Sakura is to busy seeing if Sasuke is alright. Poor Sasuke.

Kamoto: Anyway well time is up see you in the next show.

Hotomi: Peace.

* * *

Hotomi-Tsukiko: Well that's the first chapter.

Tearra: Yep.

Hotomi-Tsukiko: Oh My Gosh! It's my creator readers. Say hi Tearra-sama.

Tearra: Hi.

Hotomi-Tsukiko: Aww. Tearra-sama is shy.

Tearra: Don't forget to review. Tips would be helpful.

Hotomi-Tsukiko: Yeah reviews would be helpful. This is Tearra-sama first story. So, don't be mean.


	2. Barks, Blushes, and Pixie Dust

Hotomi-Tsukiko: Hey peoples.

Kiba: Yo.

Akamaru: Arf!

Hotomi-Tsukiko: Welcome to the second chapter of Ninjas on TV.

Kamoto: But they're not ninjas they're just regular high school students.

Kiba: She's right.

Akamaru: Arf.

Hotomi-Tsukiko:...

Kiba: I'll just go ahead and do the disclaimer. Tearra doesn't own any of the Naruto characters; but she does own Hotomi and Kamoto is her best friend's character.

RECAP

After Naruto's asswhooping, he was about to punch Sasuke; but a mysterious fist, belonging to Sakura, punched him to another planet or star. The Script writer man cracked again for the tenth time and was sentenced for a thirty minute time out.

Hotomi: Hello fans of the Tsukiko Variety Show.

Kamoto: I'm Kamoto.

Hotomi:...

Kamoto: What?

Hotomi: I was supposed to have the first line.

Kamoto: Oh... Well can we start the show over?

Director: NO! I told you in the last episode that we had limited time and money.

Hotomi: Why the hell don't you have any money? You're a famous director.

Director: I'm a famous broke director cause of you two little devils.

Kamoto: We are not devils.

Hotomi: Name a time when we did something devil like.

Director: You just broke Script writer man, Hinata can't remember who she is, you wiped a kid's memory clean now he's pooping his pants, and I have to work for you two.

Hotomi: That was so mean.

Kamoto: And so wrong.

Mystery male: What was so wrong and mean?

Hotomi: The fact that our director is a poor bum and hates us.

Director: Shut up. Don't you realize who you're talking to.

Mystery male: Wow, what a mean director.

Kamoto: Tell me about it. We have to do this show spying on Naruto and his friends in high school.

Director: Stop ignoring me and realize who you're talking to.

Mystery male: Oh, so we're going to be on TV? Isn't that cool Akamaru?

Akamaru: Arf.

Hotomi and Kamoto: What do you mean you're going to be on TV?

They both turn around to finally look at the mysterious person they were talking to. They're eyes widen at the sight before them. Just realizing what they done, they should have listened to the director.

Hotomi: Oh.

Kamoto: Shit.

Director: No, more like WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TWO STANDING THEIR!

Hotomi: Use your pixie dust, Kamoto.

Kamoto: I ran out of it.

Director: THEN GET MORE!

Kamoto: You can't buy it in stores. You have to make it.

Hotomi: THEN MAKE MORE!

Kamoto: Alright, I need five cups of toads barf, three cups of misery, and eight cups of baby org-

Hotomi: We don't have time to look for the ingredients.

Kamoto: Fine, then no pixie dust.

Hotomi: But we need the pixie dust. Go ahead and find the ingredients.

Kamoto: Fine.

Hotomi: BUT WE DON'T HAVE TIME.

Kamoto: MAKE UP YOUR MIND.

Director: SHUT UP BOTH OF YOU!

Hotomi and Kamoto:...

Director: Thank you. Wait a minute. Where are Kiba and Akamaru?

Hotomi and Kamoto: I don't know.

Camera man #1: He's running away.

Director: Catch him. Don't let him get away.

Camera crew: Yes sir!

The camera crew ran after Kiba and Akamaru; but they gave up after five minutes of running.

Director: WHY THE HELL DID YOU STOP?

Camera man #74: We have to hold our cameras on our shoulders while running. Do you know how tiring that is?

Director: And you call yourselves a camera crew. You should be ashamed of yourselves. God why did I take this job? Alright, Hotomi and Kamoto come here.

Hotomi and Kamoto: Yeah?

Director: I need you to chase after Kiba and Akamaru.

Hotomi: But that's work.

Kamoto: We don't like work.

Director: Yeah, well it's also your paycheck.

After hearing that their paycheck was in jeopardy, they ran straight towards Kiba and Akamaru with lightning speed. All the neighbors were thinking what reckless kids why can't they just play bingo and take naps. They ran past elderly people, kids, cars, and cats. They even ran past an ice cream truck, which Hotomi stopped at and order 100 gallons of mint chocolate chip ice cream. Kamoto had to drag her away; because she cared about her pay check. While chasing Kiba and Akamaru they ran into Hinata, who still couldn't remember who she was. Hope there is no lawsuits.

After jumping a few fences, they were in the backyard of Shino. He looked, well his face is covered so they couldn't tell which was frightened them. He did something they didn't expect he would do. He offered them help.

Hotomi: Why are you offering us help?

Kamoto: We just trespassed in your yard. Which by the way is stunning.

Shino: Kiba stomped on my bug when we were five. I'll never forgive him.

Hotomi: Okay...Um...So how are you going to help us?

Shino: I'll have a swarm of bees scare him to your location.

Kamoto: Will they sting him?

Shino: Yes.

Kamoto: That's so cool. You are like the coolest guy I've ever meet Shino.

Shino: *blushes*...Wait, how do you know my name?

Hotomi:...

Kamoto: My love is so strong for you I figured out your name.

Shino: *blushes even more*

Hotomi: Alright, well we got to go.

Kamoto: Shino, my love, I will never forget you.

Shino: I will never forget you either.

Kamoto: Goodbye my love.

Shino: Wait, I never got your name.

Kamoto: It's Kamoto Tsukiko.

Shino: Haven't I heard that name before? Wasn't it in a TV show?

Hotomi-Tsukiko: Well here's another chapter.

Kamoto: Uh-huh.

Tearra: She's not paying attention. She's looking at a picture of Shino.

Hotomi-Tsukiko: She's got it bad doesn't she?

Tearra: Uh-huh.

Hotomi-Tsukiko: Now you're not paying attention Creator-sama. You're staring at a picture of Accelerator. He's not even in Naruto. What the hell!

Hinata: Don't forget to review and please tell me who I am.

Hotomi-Tsukiko: Where did she come from?


End file.
